Thursday, December 19, 2013

big news: we're moving & i smell like dried sweat.

i've been avoiding this post for a while.
partly because i've been busy, but mostly because it makes the news so final.

right now, i'm sitting with an empty stomach after my final (and possibly most intense) 6am workout at crossfit palo alto. the damage is called "whitten" and i'll be paying for days. admittedly, it was a great way to end my 2.5 year stint with cfpa......wait, i'm digressing.

this is the post announcing that my husband and i are moving to ennis, montana.

but that's not all. we're not just moving to ennis in the dead of winter! that's just our first step. actually, we're spending 2014 creating a LOT of space to recover from one very intense year. and by "intense," i mean full of major life transition. there was the dying and death of my husband's mother, leaving my beloved workplace of six years, planning a wedding, marriage, and now preparing to move to another state. i'm tired. 

actually, i'm exhausted.

deep in my core, i know this is the right must thing to do. i just know it in my bones. but boy, it's been go go go non-stop to get to a place where we can finish well. 

for us, part of adjusting to being newly married includes a massive purge of our belongings. everything is up for question. our goal is to minimize our stuff down to one carload. (oh, we also sold both our cars and bought a used suv and affectionately named him "buddy." pics to eventually come.) besides a couple boxes of keepsakes per person, we're using inspiration from the 100 things challenge and zero waste home to guide our process of simplifying our lives. the hope with this experiment is that we can live a more thoughtful lifestyle by wasting less. we want to create more space for the really juicy stuff of life (people, experiences, imagination, creation, relishing nature, paying attention, relationships, values, Presence, being, whimsy...) by minimizing the distractions (artifacts that symbolize the "what if's," excessive amounts of clothes...basically, CRAP).

this process ebbs & flows between being emotionally draining and invigorating (mostly the former). it's not common practice for the typical north american household to minimize their belongings. however, it is common to live a life of accumulation. an extra water bottle here, another pair of cute boots there, craft supplies i never used but believed i must have in a moment of inspiration, booksbooksbooks, knicks & knacks. and i prided myself in living simply.... (major ego blow enters here.)

and then there are all those things i collected along the way that symbolize a story. a journey. an adventure. those tiny purple rocks i collected lakeside in glacier national park, that other little rock i carried out from the bob marshall wilderness, the feather i once found on the trail, the shiny yellow rock that stood out among its peers on my first solo backpacking trip.... those things remind me of my fear, and the courage to overcome them. how do i get rid of those things? or do i? (i still haven't decided on those yet.)

for now, all i know is that we're having a massive load of stuff picked up tonight. and the next day, there will still be more to sift through. but with each day, we get closer to a life of material freedom.

we're taking it one day at a time, until we reach the morning of january 1st, 2014 when we hug our dear friends farewell and look at our home one last time before we begin our journey onward.

ps. it's almost 2pm as i wrap this up. and yes, i really do smell like dried sweat. 


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