faceless.

wdydwyd? | bike camping to sam p taylor (again)

you know how time spent browsing the internet can go: click click click click click, pause, click click (sometimes leading to an exorbitant length of time wasted). well on one of those clicks, i stumbled onto this photo through a twitter connection. you'll notice on the bottom of the picture an opaque "wydydwyd?". when i saw it, i wondered what the heck that crazy long acronym was about, so after a .013 second search, The Google told me what i needed to know. except, the answer unexpectedly invited me into a much larger question: why do you do what you do? 

(thanks a lot google.) anyway, the question was haunting because it was impossible to get out of my head! fast forward a few days from the initial click and i get presented with a bit of a dare to post my own wdydwyd self-portrait from isaac (the guy in the photo) and he would in turn share his most impactful excerpt on joy + how that joy's manifested in his own life. (the topic of joy is in response to the work i'm doing for hopelab's joy campaign.) it seemed like an intriguing trade!! 

so this weekend while bike camping up to samuel p taylor, i thought it'd be fun to invite my biking buddy kristen to participate (...as well as whoever else we'd meet along the way)! here are the folks who we asked to play, including kristen:

(from left to right)
bc / 24 / farmers market stall employee
jim / 37 / marin community farm stands organizer
paul / 33 / artist, illustrator, cyclist
scott / 58 / sand sculptor, artist
kristen / 26 / flight attendent, climber, up-for-adventure gal pal

you know what surprised me? 
bc, jim, and scott had immediate responses when presented with the question! they didn't hesitate at all. i was inspired by their clarity and confidence in the moment. 


and then there's my response to wdydwyd. i had a few statements that resonate true for me right now, but the one below is most befitting since one of my intentions this year is to live in the reality that i am beloved. in this particular journey, i've noticed that the gift is two-fold: i've been able to believe not just in my own belovedness, but also enter into others' belovedness (both of which which can be challenging at times).


i'm finding that to see oneself and to see another as beloved might be one of the most motivating reasons to be kind, tender and vulnerable, to show grace and to practice integrity, to commit and pursue, to speak truth, to be open to changing, to delight and to choose to love...


so why do i do what i do? because i love being changed by:


(ps. this photo was taken on a tree stump with a timer. apparently, i missed my head and stood about 12" from being in focus - a lovely recipe for an interesting photo!)


thank you isaac for challenging me to act on my curiosity & to reflect on this simple, yet profound question.

forget what you know.

question assumption. 
stop and wonder. 
be curious.
re-wonder.


i did this recently by asking myself if my "dining room" really needed to be a dining room? sure it's the room right next to the kitchen, but i'd much rather have a studio to paint and sand, and to enjoy a glass of wine while getting my hands real dirty. so i said goodbye to the room formerly known as the dining room!


i spent last thursday evening staining some wood and painting with minimal light wee into the night. there, happiness glazed over me.

i wonder what else in my life is posing as something because it "should be" rather than being what it could be?

post #401

missing baby love.
(& ps. that's my sister's nostril on the top right).

let there be

flow.

there's so much movement around and within me. yet, in a very reassuring way, i feel grounded. this groundedness feels refined by way of iteration.

translation: it's a familiar cycle that i've seen come and go and come and go. and this time around, i've handled it a bit differently - with a little more wisdom and perspective. (i guess it just comes with this old age. ha ha).

this new-old movement excites me at the core. there's a heart/mind/soul/body connection about some long-needed decisions that i'm making that keeps me wanting to take step after step. (i know i'm being vague).

the neat thing about this process is that even if the outcome doesn't turn out exactly as i had hoped, i think the real result is in being present to the process....it's in the movement.

we're at the cusp of revolutionary change. i feel it. and i want to be part of it.

self-portrait 10 & 11

i confess. (and not like anyone really cared). but, i forgot - i mean, neglected - to post my self-portrait for october. i sort of like to think that this post was my self-portrait b/c in fact, it was a reflection of myself.,, uh.ok ok. anyway. to make up for it, i'm giving you this:

self-portrait 8

my colleague took this of me with my new 5D the day that i received it.

happiness
joy
&
a lil
rar

self-portrait 7

Try to guess where I took this picture. Winner wins an ice cold beer, courtesy of your wallet and local convenience store.


















Now, try to guess where I am and what it is that is creating my reflection. If you get this right, I am seriously going to think of a VERY COOL REWARD. Name it...and win. You can guess as many times as you want. (No other contests offers that option!)

self-portrait 6

i don't normally have red toes, but a week or so ago, i was feeling kinda flirty, so i painted them. "oOoooo:"

self-portrait 5

It's already May of 2008. It's hard to believe that it's almost summer time because next thing we all know, we'll be saying happythanksgiving-merrychristmas-&-HAPPY NEW YEAR! But, it is still May -- so I'll try to stay present to the here and now. Which means one thing: it's time for my monthly self-portrait.

And, to tell you the truth...I got too lazy to come up with a creative self-portrait for this month (kinda like last month). Steph suggested I take a picture with Photo Booth, which I used for the first time 10 minutes ago, to take this lovely picture.













Actually, this shot is the best one of oh..about a dozen or so. Steph had to watch me make ridiculous faces and funny sound effects to match the look and shape of my mouth. She said something like, "uh, the pictures won't capture sound." YEAH, I KNOW STEPH -- THANKS FOR THE REMINDER. *growl*

Anyway, I was feeling really narcissistic taking all these pictures of me so I picked up any prop I could find near me to make me feel better. And, lucky me..my favorite mag finally came today and guess who the featured: Oh yeah.....The Big O. (It's interesting how similar they made this month's cover to a previous cover with Al Gore).

Doesn't Obama look handsome in this cover? I tried taking one of me giving him a kiss, but felt like it might be a bit inappropriate to post on this G-rated blog. So, you'll just have to imagine my kissy face, but o wait -- it probably looked just like that weird kissy face picture I posted above.

self-portrait 4

I wanted do something totally crazy for the April self-portrait. So I went really wild with this shot - REALLY WILD.














While in San Diego, I got a haircut from this korean lady that my sister goes to.

Me: "I sort of want bangs, but I duno...they usually come out bad on me."
Korean Lady with accent: [Thinks and flips my hair around a little.] "I'll make your dreams come true!"

It sounded so convincing, I couldn't resist. Next time I go back, I'm not just getting my hair cut...I'm going to ask her to make my dream of owning a pony come true.

--
Self-portrait Archive: 1, 2, & 3

self-portrait 3

self-portrait 2

I'm trying to take pictures everyday this year as a way to photojournal 2008. As part of that process, I'll document me around this time of every month. I'm contemplating whether or not they will all be of me with a large black object in front of my face....maybe red?

self-portrait